Richard Rohr says a healthy masculinity incorporates five truths: (1) Life is hard. (2) You’re not in control. (3) You’re going to die. (4) You’re not that important. (5) Life is not about you. This is why boys need godfathers (good fathers). It is mostly the case that strong spiritual direction doesn’t come from dad. That’s not to be regretted. It’s just how it is.